Writing About The No Excuse-We Just Love to Party- Party

By: George Wallace

Ironically I wrote my original notes for this piece at a Christmas party. I wasn’t feeing particularly Scrooge-ish, neither was I foaming with ebullient Christmas Cheer. In fact, I’d not yet even had a single beer to drink. We had arrived early, it was still daylight out, the sun was not yet past the yard arm, and I had little to do. I wrote some notes in the back of my rapidly expiring calendar.

My beginning notes read: “The No Excuse-We Just Love to Party- Party” as compared to the ever expanding plethora of Christmas parties. When I was growing up, it was a Christmas party at school, in Scouts, at church youth group, at my parent’s social groups, at important social gatherings: Dad’s American Legion, Dad’s Masons, Mom’s Eastern Star, Mom’s quilting group, and two or three more for whom I probably never ever even knew the names.

Then there’s Elks, Kiwanis, Moose, Rotary, Lions, The Sons and Daughters of Norway, Sweden, Poland, Transylvania, Bavaria, etc., etc.

When I’d grown into an adult, it was Christmas parties at my workplace, my wife’s workplace, at church, and every other organization and club to which you and your kids claim membership: Brownies, Bluebirds, Cubs, Scouts, Camp Fire, Band, Computer Club, etc., etc., etc., ad nauseous. Add to this major scheduling horror the perils of every group’s social chairperson’s idiot idea of a proper gift exchange process. Many the time I came very close to suggesting loaded pistols at twenty paces. Somehow I always held myself back. Now, late in my life, I regret not being more bold. Some of those people really deserved a 50 caliber bullet in the teeth and gullet.

It is enough to cause any sane person to throw open the shutters and throw up the sash and scream out into the winter’s cold night, “Bah! Humbug! Hooray for the Grinch!”

Then there’s the Party Organizing Committees that plan for every party possibility under the sun, moon, and stars. There are Theme and Music Committees. A Committee for Social Mixer Games and Activities. The Decorations Committee. The Food Committee. The Cake and Punch Committee. The dreaded Gift Exchange Committee. The Punch and Booze Committee. And the obligatory Sub-Committee on Weed. The Designated Driver Committee. The Safe Sex and Condom Committee. And, finally, of course, The Clean Up Committee.

All of this is no way to celebrate such a simple thing as the birth of a child. Although when you think about it, these activities must have certainly added to world population growth over the years.

It is obvious that our society just does not plan for enough parties, otherwise there is no way that we would deliberately cluster so many parties into such a short period on the yearly calendar. It is simply too much stress for many members of society. We need a National No Excuse Monthly Party, just so we can practice for the end of the year. We need such parties monthly just so we can relieve the stress on a more frequent basis, and spread out the pain, so to speak.

I suggest the last workday Friday of each month as an appropriate date. Even in December. Practice is practice. And maybe we can to start to be brave enough to suggest when it come up for discussion that this year, “Let’s pass on a Christmas Party. The No Excuse Party is coming soon enough.”

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(c) Copyright 2006: George Wallace recently published a book on religion which lashes out at nearly all of the comfortable ideas about God, the trappings of organized religion, and the priesthood. His pithy comments and suggestions for a return to a God-centered personal religion will interest everyone. This article may be freely reprinted so long as all copyright attributions, and the full content of this resource box are included. www.OhGodIsThatYou.com

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